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Exams..

2:57 AM

28/2
Blog Song: Liang Jing Ru - Hua Yuan

YEAH YEAH!!feel so satisfied now!!haha..uploaded Liang Jing Ru - Hua Yuan on iweb!!woo hoo!!this is a big thing for me k..finally i know how to upload!!haha..currently learning this song..

Yona banana ate FOUR bowls of porridge!!scary.....

exams for this whole week..thats why time passes so slow..LOL.. =S

well..CNY had been fun!!wahaha..spent my 1st and 2nd day at family chalet..haha..we ate bbq food for almost every meal...... =S went home and drank 3 bottles of vitagen..constipated..LOL..after the vitagen..wah seh..so much better man..

then tze hui and chen yie came to my house on the 3rd day..haha..had a nice time chatting and eating..my mum cook alot of food..haha..got abalone leh..LOL..my mum said got guests visit our hse must have the best food possible..if not might as well dun invite..steady..like what she said..haha..

alot of things happen within a few days..tired liao..so not going to be bothered..actually im not bothered by the matter itself..im bothered for those ppl who are bothered by it..LOL..what an irony..

MC was closed for 10 DAYS!!my gosh!!thats long lah..miss my FLG very much man(yonabanana!!neh ni neh ni boo boo!!)..hahahahaha..hoping to start lesson this sat..cant wait for my music lesson to start man..oh ya!bought Peter Lao Shi album as well!!he did say that we can ask for his signature when we had bought it..haha..i think im the only one in my class who bought it..so going to ask for his signature if lesson starts this sat!!so exciting!!yona..please stop your "spell-casting"!!!!!! =S

hmm..these few days..i have been thinking on the issue of being putting a mask in front of ppl..think in asia..it is sum what in our culture to not let our real feelings show..we are afraid of getting hurt/we dun want ppl to think that we are weak if we show our weaknesses..seriously..i think this is a lie..a terrible big lie..cos after thinking, i think a person who can show his or her real feelings are the strongest ppl..they dare to do that, not afraid of what others think..

last time, i used to tell myself..i dun want to trust/love(any sort of love) ppl liao..cos the chance of getting betray is high and the tough thing to handle is when you have to deal with the aftermath..the emotions upheavals and alot of "why" questions..

in my opinion, we have to agree is it is impossible to love or trust without experiencing hurts.. i think the mentality that most of us has is that we want to trust/love sumone totally(means not taking any risk)..but actual fact is that we as human beings, will definitely hurt ppl and vice versa..there is no perfect humanly relationships on earth..we can always improve but it is impossible to have perfections..And the trouble is if you don't risk anything, you risk even more..think this is what i call risk-taking faith..

another thing is alot of us(me included) tend to close ourselves up when we were hurt before..so we made up our mind not to trust anyone fully again..if we were hurt the 2nd time, the chance of us trusting other ppl will be much lesser than previous time..so in order to so call protect ourselves, we dun trust anyone fully again..or at least more than 70%..after giving it more tots, i tot i would trust again with the risk of getting hurt, than to rather shut myself up and stop trusting anyone..i wld rather myself to take the risk..cos at least i wun miss out the possibility of having a imperfect but fulfilling relationship..heh..to close your heart means not only you are preventing yourself from getting hurt, you are shutting off yourself from any fulfilling relationships as well..

then again, at the other half of the balance..please dun just trust any Tom, Dick and Harry or any Mary, Nancy and Lucy..im not saying you shld just trust everyone and anyone in your social circle..please use discernment..you dun have to tell the person whom you had met for the first time your bad childhood..and your whole life story..give each other more time to get to know one another better..after some "testings" and you know that this person is reliable, if you decided to trust..then just go ahead..if in return you get betrayed, rem that the fault is not yours..you have done your best part..please dun wallow in self-reproach which i think is the most brainless thing to do..after dealing with the aftermath, pat yourself on the back, be brave and move on again..it is just so not fair to deprive yourself and others of trust just becos of one person..YEAH!!

of cos this whole process takes time..to trust certain sumone..but please dun take forever before deciding to trust lah..we dun have forever..

haha..so now after saying so much..i think my next action pt is to trust my closer frens more than 80%..im glad that im blessed with a handful of closer frens whom i can developed a more fulfilling frenship/relationship with by being more open to them, dare to be vulnerable before them..they may actually think im very open lah..but i think there is still room for improvemt..heh..im actually looking forward to that!!haha..there will definitely be ups and downs..but im going to be brave and have risk-taking faith!!yeah yeah!!go go go Eileen!!

muahaha..this post is just most of my tots of the week lah..hope this post helps!!if it really help you, please call 1800-1234567 and vote for me..if it doesn't, please vote as well..LOL..crap..my brain abit siao after all the mugging lah..

coughing for 3 weeks le!!still haven recovered..plus with the exam stress, it is definitely not helping me.....nvm..Be healed in Jesus' name!!Amen!!

" Be brave and fight on!!"

Eileen

posted by cookoxt31 on 2:57 AM
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